First Relationship (The Ultimate Guide + Image Quotes)

If only we could go back in time and be young again! We were young and in love, but with the knowledge we now have. Oh, to have that point of view! My first real relationship was a shambles, with a slew of blunders, so I'm writing this to my younger self, before I started dating boys. If you haven't started dating yet, please read this to better prepare yourself for what's to come.

1. Only you have the ability to define yourself

Your boyfriend or girlfriend does not define you. Before entering into any type of serious relationship, a person must be confident in himself or herself. You must be content with who you are and the decisions you make when you are alone. Do not rely on another person to make you happy.

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2. Never neglect your friends or family in order to pursue a romantic relationship

Leaving your friends for a boy or girl is a great way to ruin great friendships. Take my word for it! Your family and friends were the first to arrive. Don't think you'll be able to ignore them and they'll still be waiting for you if your relationship fails. Make time for your other relationships because it is better to have a diverse network than only one person in your life.

3. You don't always get your happily ever after

Unfortunately, high school relationships only last 2 percent of the time. When you're young and your hormones are making you dizzy and sick with love, it's difficult to understand. Nothing and no one could ever stand in the way of your love! Ever! No matter how wonderful a relationship appears to be, it may not last if you are too young to know what you want.

4. Keep your heart safe, but not too safe

Because your first relationship may not last, it is best to be cautious, at least initially. At the same time, in order to have a romantic relationship, you must be able to open up. Try your hardest to strike this balance.

5. You could get hurt

This is a natural part of life, and it is almost to be expected. Vulnerability occurs when you open yourself up to another person. This creates a close bond between two people, but it can also open you up to a world of pain. It is entirely up to you how much of your heart you are willing to put at risk for the sake of the relationship.

(((Instant Book Preview of The First Relationship)))

6. You are deserving of respect, both from yourself and from your partner

Set boundaries ahead of time. Determine what is acceptable in terms of how you are treated, both verbally and physically. Then tell your partner and stick to your guns. It's a terrible feeling to realize along the way that you've given up too much.

7. You cannot make your love the center of the universe

Life is still going on around you. There are still decisions to be made, as well as responsibilities like homework, chores, and/or working. Don't neglect the rest of your life to spend time with your boyfriend or girlfriend.

8. No one belongs to you, and no one belongs to you

Being in a relationship does not imply that you have lost your sense of self. You should have your own interests and friends. At the same time, recognize that your boyfriend or girlfriend requires his or her own hobbies and social groups. You should be able to spend time together, but not every waking moment.

9. You can never make someone change their mind

This is one of the most difficult lessons to learn (especially for women, as we seem to want to change our men). A person may act as if he or she is changing to make you happy, but if the person does not truly want to change, the change may not last long.

10. It's not like what you've seen in the movies

Oh, Hollywood, how you deceive the world's youth with your gold-spun love and romance stories! We are led to believe that finding romantic love is the most wonderful thing in life. Problems are supposed to melt away, there is no fighting, and you drive off into the sunset with your mate, a complete person. Romance is wonderful, but it takes effort to keep a relationship alive. If you truly want it to last, you must be willing to put in the effort.

11. Make use of this experience as a learning opportunity

Sure, you could stay with your first love and grow old together, but if not, use your first relationship as a learning experience. Where did things go wrong? What went well? How could you have communicated more effectively? These are all things we learn from our early relationships that will help us cultivate a better one later on.

(((Instant Book Preview of Becoming Attached)))

Don't be alarmed by this list. Love can be truly amazing. The problem is that you may not know how to deal with, or even be aware of, the negative consequences of your first relationship. Learn from these experiences and you'll be more prepared when you take that first step.

Any advice for newcomers from those of you with experience in the relationship world?

If only we could go back in time and be young again! We were young and in love, but with the knowledge we now have. Oh, to have that point of view! My first real relationship was a shambles, with a slew of blunders, so I'm writing this to my younger self, before I started dating boys. If you haven't started dating yet, please read this to better prepare yourself for what's to come.

1. Only you have the ability to define yourself

Your boyfriend or girlfriend does not define you. Before entering into any type of serious relationship, a person must be confident in himself or herself. You must be content with who you are and the decisions you make when you are alone. Do not rely on another person to make you happy.

2. Never neglect your friends or family in order to pursue a romantic relationship

Leaving your friends for a boy or girl is a great way to ruin great friendships. Take my word for it! Your family and friends were the first to arrive. Don't think you'll be able to ignore them and they'll still be waiting for you if your relationship fails. Make time for your other relationships because it is better to have a diverse network than only one person in your life.

3. You don't always get your happily ever after

Unfortunately, high school relationships only last 2 percent of the time. When you're young and your hormones are making you dizzy and sick with love, it's difficult to understand. Nothing and no one could ever stand in the way of your love! Ever! No matter how wonderful a relationship appears to be, it may not last if you are too young to know what you want.

4. Keep your heart safe, but not too safe

Because your first relationship may not last, it is best to be cautious, at least initially. At the same time, in order to have a romantic relationship, you must be able to open up. Try your hardest to strike this balance.

(((Instant Book Preview of First Year of Marriage)))

5. You could get hurt

This is a natural part of life, and it is almost to be expected. Vulnerability occurs when you open yourself up to another person. This creates a close bond between two people, but it can also open you up to a world of pain. It is entirely up to you how much of your heart you are willing to put at risk for the sake of the relationship.

6. You are deserving of respect, both from yourself and from your partner

Set boundaries ahead of time. Determine what is acceptable in terms of how you are treated, both verbally and physically. Then tell your partner and stick to your guns. It's a terrible feeling to realize along the way that you've given up too much.

7. You cannot make your love the center of the universe

Life is still going on around you. There are still decisions to be made, as well as responsibilities like homework, chores, and/or working. Don't neglect the rest of your life to spend time with your boyfriend or girlfriend.

8. No one belongs to you, and no one belongs to you

Being in a relationship does not imply that you have lost your sense of self. You should have your own interests and friends. At the same time, recognize that your boyfriend or girlfriend requires his or her own hobbies and social groups. You should be able to spend time together, but not every waking moment.

9. You can never make someone change their mind

This is one of the most difficult lessons to learn (especially for women, as we seem to want to change our men). A person may act as if he or she is changing to make you happy, but if the person does not truly want to change, the change may not last long.

10. It's not like what you've seen in the movies

Oh, Hollywood, how you deceive the world's youth with your gold-spun love and romance stories! We are led to believe that finding romantic love is the most wonderful thing in life. Problems are supposed to melt away, there is no fighting, and you drive off into the sunset with your mate, a complete person. Romance is wonderful, but it takes effort to keep a relationship alive. If you truly want it to last, you must be willing to put in the effort.

(((Instant Book Preview of First Love)))

11. Make use of this experience as a learning opportunity

Sure, you could stay with your first love and grow old together, but if not, use your first relationship as a learning experience. Where did things go wrong? What went well? How could you have communicated more effectively? These are all things we learn from our early relationships that will help us cultivate a better one later on.

Don't be alarmed by this list. Love can be truly amazing. The problem is that you may not know how to deal with, or even be aware of, the negative consequences of your first relationship. Learn from these experiences and you'll be more prepared when you take that first step.

Any advice for newcomers from those of you with experience in the relationship world?

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